Thursday, May 19, 2011

My Body

I love my body. There, I said it. I love my body.

I had this thought strike my brain today as I was walking to the restroom at work. If you would have told me that I would ever feel, or think, this thought just 6 months ago... I would've called you crazy. If you would have told me that I would be 250 pounds and thinking it, I would've rolled my eyes at you and dismissed it right out.

But today I thought it. I felt it. I believed it. I am proud of this body right now. I have lost 65 pounds! I have changed everything about my relationship with food. I have gotten my ass up off the couch day after day after day. I have put on workout clothes and either pushed play on the DVD player, or carted my booty to the gym. I've gone outside to walk or run. I have done this.

I have had a great deal of help along the way. One of the best things I could've ever done on this journey was to surround myself with people who love, support, and encourage me. Not once have they told me that I can't do it. Not once have they told me that I'm mad for tackling the obstacles I've come up against. They have believed in me when I lacked faith. They told me I was strong and beautiful when I felt my worst. Without them, I may have never started on this path.

My body isn't where I want it to be yet. I am still fat. I still have more rolls than a bakery and I still struggle with what I feel should be the easiest workouts. But I am still moving. I am still getting up and doing.

My body is strong. My body is changing shape on a daily basis. I am blessed that I can get up out of bed every day and work on my health. Not everyone has this luxury. I wasted the last 20 years allowing fat to override every wish, every dream, every desire. I have allowed it to take my confidence, and my positive self-image. I have thrown away all these years believing that I was "less-than" because of fat. Not anymore.

I love my body. Every flaw, every new muscle, every bone and fiber.... it's mine. And I am proud of where I am. I am excited to keep going. I am giddy over what lays ahead of me. Because I love me.

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