Monday, July 25, 2011

No More Whining

It's taken me an entire week to get past the news from the doctor. A week full of snippy remarks to friends and family. A week full of wanting to do nothing more than stay curled up in bed and not talk to anyone ever.

Yea, I was throwing a grown-up temper tantrum. I was pissed off. I was sad. I was angry at both myself for not doing better, and at my specialist for talking down to me. I was so unsure of what to do. I was scared and felt that no one understood just how terrifying it all was.

A week post-appointment, however, I am back in the gym. Today I went back with a vengeance. I was not going to let this beat me anymore. I wasn't told that I was going to die any time soon. These things are controllable. Why am I giving it all this power?

No more whining. Just moving and sweating and getting it done. Rawr!

2 comments:

  1. You said it there. "Why am I giving it all this power?"
    Why are you giving it all YOUR power?
    Detach yourself from it and give me the advice you would give me if this was me you were talking about. Now listen to what you would say.

    I am constantly fighting with my health, mine isn't diabetic complications or cholesterol, it's more depression, tinnitus, pleurisy and so on...I know how frustrating it is to have your health act one way when all you want is for it to balance its self out. I've come to terms with the fact that some of my health complications have no cures, but I can manage how they cause me to react and live. I am living and have x,y and z. I am not a person suffering from anything at all....most days. Sometimes I give it my power, throw myself a pity party and act like a turd...we need to do that :P
    You have this. Numbers aside, you working out, eating right and feeling good for doing it is what matters. So it doesn't help you where you need it to right now, that's not why you're doing it in the first place. Your emotional benefits outweigh it all. You got this.
    I can't wait to see you grab it by the horns and force it's ass into place!

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  2. Audrey, this was about the best thing anyone could've said to me right now. It's all about perspective. And I had lost that. Thank you. You helped to make my day that much brighter. You're the bestest. :)

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